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iamlemonysnicket
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Name: Lemony
Gender: Male
Interests: Writing the tales of the Baudelaire orphans to the general public.
Expertise: Writing the tales of the Baudelaire orphans to the general public.
Occupation: Other
Industry: Research
Message: message me
Member Since:
9/6/2004
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Dear Reader,
You are presumably looking at the back of this book, or the end of the end. The end of the end is the best place to begin the end, because if you read the end from the beginning of the beginning of the end to the end of the end of the end, you will arrive at the end of the end of your rope.
This book is the last in A Series of Unfortunate Events, and even if you braved the previous twelve volumes, you probably can't stand such unpleasantries as a fearsome storm, a suspicious beverage, a herd of wild sheep, an enormous bird cage, and a truly haunting secret about the Baudelaire parents.
It has been my solemn occupation to complete the history of the Baudelaire orphans, and at last I am finished. You likely have some other occupation, so if I were you I would drop this book at once, so the end does not finish you.
With all due respect,
Lemony Snicket
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| THE END draws ever so close, and the cover has, unfortunately, been released. I hope I got here in time to warn you of the evil e-mail that carried this information, and not to go to barnesandnoble.com or amazaon.com to see the cover.
With all due respect,
Lemony Snicket | | |
| General public,
I have decided to reveal secrets, so as to save my life, and I have successfully delivered a manuscript entitled The Beatrice Letters to HarperCollins. This book should come out on September 5 of this year, to add more misfortune before the end. But, as the story goes, I need to relay the tales of the Baudelaires to you, the general public.
With all due respect,
Lemony Snicket | | |
| You need to be careful, because there has been official information on THE END. I won't give the soure (barnesandnoble.com) but don't go see it. That must mean my research on the Baudelaire case is finally complete, and I don't know whether I have cleared my name or not.
With all due respect,
Lemony Snicket.
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| I have been detained for quite some time now, but I promise I will uncover the horrible truths of what happened to the Baudelaires. My investigation should end and the terrible, unfortunate account, should be on bookshelves (please don't read it) by October. My dear publishers, I hope you get my message. Remember, you are my last hope that the tales of the Baudelaire orphans can be told to the general public.
With all due respect,
Lemony Snicket
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